Still Alive

I have been sick, sick, and sicker.  A croupy cough, snotty nose, gunky chest, hacking cough, more snot, a fever, then a round of coughing until I threw up for two days, then a few days later an actual stomach bug and more of the pukes. That was yesterday, actually.  I feel like I have been run through a wringer, my joints ache and I am still dehydrated, but bouncing back ever so slowly.   My voice still comes and goes.

A few things have happened.  I got new glasses, which feel very heavy after 5 years with my half ounce pair.  But they are so scratched up that I can't actually see with them on, so...these super heavy ones it is.

My father is trying to die, but for real, unlike my overdramatic attempts with this chest cold.  He's run down to the point of being worn out and I don't think he has anything in that reserve tank.  I've been running interference from afar, terrified of giving him this crud and actually succeeding in doing him in.  His wife says he sleeps all the time and has thrown out his medicine.  He's stopped doing anything he likes and is not even leaving the house anymore.  She's ready to kill him for the worry it's causing because it's not like him at all.  Sometimes she calls just to say, "Well, he's still breathing.  I can hear him in there snoring."

I am at a loss, he's a grown man who has never had a health issue until that stroke at Christmas.  Since then, he's been in increasingly worse shape despite physical therapy and about 50 doctors appointments.  He keeps being told how lucky he is, but to his mind and, he's right, he's always been very healthy.  It doesn't feel very lucky to have half your body feel like it's got an electrical current running through it.  His hand feels like it is cold, he can't hold things very well, he stumbles sometimes.  He's showing his age all at once.  The doctors have been useless, that I can sympathize with at least.  I'm wondering if acupuncture might help.  I wonder if he has apnea.  He's refusing to go to any more doctors.  I wonder if I can get him in a headlock.  He's pretty little...

I want to be over this crud so I can go look at him and see what my heart says to do.  I'm only getting filtered info and have not spoken directly to him in over 2 weeks.  I'm just getting this down as a point of reference, I don't expect blogging about it will accomplish anything, it's just been a big part of the last week or so and I'm having to make decisions without enough information, in particular about what HE wants.  Judy and I would prop him up with a drip and keep him hanging on another 20 years if it were up to us.  I just read a book I think he would like.  He still hasn't been out in the kayaks, we were threatening to drive to Maine together-him to get it off his list, me to actually SEE some stuff.

Anyway, that's the goings on.  Cairn kindly sent me a second water bottle after I tattled on Ben for stealing my first one.  I've joined a few camping trips and one manatee snorkeling trip that went from pretty basic to INSANE this past week.  I'm going to snorkel with manatee and then paddle around Florida in my wee boat a few days.  Those nuts can do what they want, whew!

Here are a few pics:

From the full moon trip to see the bats-which we actually saw this time.

Matt is skeptical about Kimberly's boat.  It does not match ours.  

Glasses:

Drove out to see the moon rise Friday:

The house is in that clump of trees

All of my moon shots were blurry.

Back at the house, the dogs had thoughtfully cornered this tiny possum.

The possum was less excited to see us.

It was on the other side of the fence from the dogs, but I guess it didn't really know that and froze up anyway.

I fully do not understand how freezing up is a good defense.  They are house pets, not the Jurassic Park T-rex.

Matt is off to Baltimore until Tuesday.  YES!  Yes, he did cancel our backpacking trip for my birthday because he did not want to reschedule his rehab appointment Monday.  YES!  Yes, he DID INDEED reschedule it anyway after he got the chance to travel for work!  NO!  No, he will not be home ON MY BIRTHDAY.
NO!  No, I am not irritated AT ALL.  WHY WOULD I BE?

Okay, I am a little.  :/
And it's rehab for a back injury, not a drug problem.