I just finished reading this book, title above, by Sara Zarr. It's about a girl who has sex at 13 and while there are next to no details of the act, the aftermath becomes her own personal pergatory for years.
In one scene, her best-her only-girl friend asks her advice about sex. She blows the actual advice, but thinks to herself about what she could have done:
I’d tell her about sex; the good stuff, like how it could be warm and exciting-it took you away-and the not-so-good things, like, how once you showed someone that part of yourself, you had to trust them one thousand percent and anything could happen. Someone you though you knew could change and suddenly not want you, suddenly decide you made a better story than a girlfriend. Or how sometimes you might think you wanted to do it and then halfway through or afterward realize no, you just wanted the company, really; you wanted someone to choose you , and the sex part itself was like a trade-off, something you felt like you had to give to get the other part. I’d tell her all that and help her decide.
The thing that 'got' me the most in the story was how she was having sex with this guy she did not even like that much because no one else in her life was paying any attention, and he was.
That was profound to read, I feel like while I still would have been a horny idiot teen and would have still handed my virginity to the first boy who looked at me twice, reading that would have hit home and maybe it would have been in time to keep my self esteem from being so damaged. Or not, I can't say now. I can say, I will be paying attention to my own daughter. This may be close to my story, but it does not have to be anything like hers.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Lights
The lamest and easiest of all bokeh (blurred) shots to take-yet still my favorite. Heather and I threatened to learn a new way of doing them last year, maybe this is the year we accomplish our dreams! hahaha
Flurricane '09
With drifts of nearly 2 inches, Flurricane '09 was the most snow we have had this year. It bodes well for the rest of the winter, hopefully we will have more snow!
Birthday-Ben
We had lunch here on the day of Ben's birthday and then met other friends in town the next day. Ben was thrilled to have such a fuss made over him. : )
Good Weekend
Our weekend started Friday evening with slabs of cheesy lasagna and yummy Mt. Dew. I love that stuff, it's SO sweet and fizzy and bad for you. I almost never buy it any more, but it was on sale! : ) We finished up the first season of Castle via Netflix.
We woke up yesterday to snow in a decent layer over most of the yard and had a lovely time of running around and getting cold and damp while it quickly melted.
Matt and I spent a couple hours snuggled into our big bed, snoozing, while the kids played on the computers and watched a movie. We watched CSI last night and got that disc all finished up to send back.
Jake and I worked through the first several questions in the GED prep book, it's funny how I was worried the multiple choice format would be difficult since he has never had a test before. But after the first couple, he was reading ahead of me while I was pointing out how to use the list of possible answers along with the question and was just giving me the correct answer while I was still yacking about "B. replace 'there' with 'their'. So you want to look at each word in the context of the sentence and decide if one is...okay never mind."
Today Matt and I did a little Christmas shopping in town and picked up some groceries. We had turkey sandwiches and sweet tea from Bob Gibson's-which should be just under ambrosia on the list of good things.
On the way home, we looked at a house for sale right in Falkville. It has a very small yard-maybe 3/4 acre and is on the corner, but it's a really big house, twice the size of this one. It has a nice wrap-around porch, too. And new siding and a metal roof. It's yellow, it all looks very neat and clean. I don't think it's the one for us, I would feel on display! I never want what other people might think to factor in to what we do in our own yard. : )
On the way back home, we managed to get in This American Life on NPR and once here, everyone had a walk in the pasture in the freezing dark. I have a few little goodies tucked into the closet for Christmas and picked up a new science kit for our homeschool.
It was a good weekend. Nothing exciting happened, no one had a revelation or life-altering event. Matt did express astonishment that I plan to get a job once the kids are grown and wonders why I don't just go back to school instead. I did point out that at some point I would have to get a degree in SOMETHING, preferably something I would make money doing. I will only be 43 when Ben is 18, if he gets his GED at 14-which I am positive he could do, I will be 39 and out of work!
I wonder if I could combine chocolate, travel, homeschool, reading and photography into something I get paid for. What would that degree be? : )
We woke up yesterday to snow in a decent layer over most of the yard and had a lovely time of running around and getting cold and damp while it quickly melted.
Matt and I spent a couple hours snuggled into our big bed, snoozing, while the kids played on the computers and watched a movie. We watched CSI last night and got that disc all finished up to send back.
Jake and I worked through the first several questions in the GED prep book, it's funny how I was worried the multiple choice format would be difficult since he has never had a test before. But after the first couple, he was reading ahead of me while I was pointing out how to use the list of possible answers along with the question and was just giving me the correct answer while I was still yacking about "B. replace 'there' with 'their'. So you want to look at each word in the context of the sentence and decide if one is...okay never mind."
Today Matt and I did a little Christmas shopping in town and picked up some groceries. We had turkey sandwiches and sweet tea from Bob Gibson's-which should be just under ambrosia on the list of good things.
On the way home, we looked at a house for sale right in Falkville. It has a very small yard-maybe 3/4 acre and is on the corner, but it's a really big house, twice the size of this one. It has a nice wrap-around porch, too. And new siding and a metal roof. It's yellow, it all looks very neat and clean. I don't think it's the one for us, I would feel on display! I never want what other people might think to factor in to what we do in our own yard. : )
On the way back home, we managed to get in This American Life on NPR and once here, everyone had a walk in the pasture in the freezing dark. I have a few little goodies tucked into the closet for Christmas and picked up a new science kit for our homeschool.
It was a good weekend. Nothing exciting happened, no one had a revelation or life-altering event. Matt did express astonishment that I plan to get a job once the kids are grown and wonders why I don't just go back to school instead. I did point out that at some point I would have to get a degree in SOMETHING, preferably something I would make money doing. I will only be 43 when Ben is 18, if he gets his GED at 14-which I am positive he could do, I will be 39 and out of work!
I wonder if I could combine chocolate, travel, homeschool, reading and photography into something I get paid for. What would that degree be? : )
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Hiking-Wade Mountain
Just a nice 3-mile stroll with the kids and Matt.
I am really liking Wade Mountain!
I am really liking Wade Mountain!
Birthday- Jake
Late, but I don't think I am being graded.
(If I am, I would like to know exactly who feels they have that right!)
Anyway, we had a sleepover for Jake's birthday on Friday the 13th. Emily, Kaitlin, Britney, Cody and Austin came over and ate pizza and junk food and stayed up too late and all the typical stuff expected at sleep-overs. They cleared out 4 cases of soda in 12 hours.
On Saturday, his birthday, Evan came over and spent the night and Sunday, Suzette came by to pick them both up and they all went to spend the night at Evan's house. Evan just turned 17 and he and Jake ran around in the yard and giggled like idiots and whacked each other with sticks and laid in the bed and watched movies on the in car dvd player using the wall jack. Not quite what I expected really. Next year, I don't think I will bother splitting the age groups up. hahaha!
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