I finally lost the 9 pounds I gained-starting on the camping trip-last month. Only took me 6 weeks and several setbacks. But I am back to my lowest point and plan to forge ahead to new ground. Here is the suck part. When I gained everything the first time, I was pregnant/new mama and it all packed on evenly with the extra bulge at the belly that has been my bane for 15 years. My wrath is very unfiery...
When I RE-gained the 9 pounds last month, it was ALL on my belly. Which, even though I am back to my earlier weight, is not as small around as it was. If that's not incentive...I can't think of anything else that would make me want to avoid gaining again. Apparently when you pack on new mother pounds, it spreads out and sits on the muscles to ensure you can make milk and keep the baby warm, when you just pack on fat, it's ab fat. I saw a video about how it packs in around the organs, that kind of fat. UGH.
I have been walking and have built up to 3 miles a day 5 out of 7 days. It's not so bad in the evenings, I still get sweaty, but at least the sun is not baking me. The recent rains have really helped cool off the world and it's lovely walking out here past all the green-again fields with the sun making the sky pink and orange and the mist rising up along the tree lines in the distance. It's very calming. The local cows line up to look at me, hay dangling from the corner of their mouth, occasionally a calf will bolt and skitter, making the other babies charge around and the mama cows back up a step and eyeball me harder.
I have not had an issue with dogs the way we have in the past riding bikes. I may break Matt's bike out and see if I can get in a 10 mile ride now and then to break up the monotony. With all the hills, I'd coast half the ride and sweat and struggle the other half! I am glad to be back on my way again, I lost my footing for a while there. I am still not totally over my mental funk, but I feel the grip loosening and I can shake it off by doing things with the kids or walking or keeping the house up to snuff. As long as I feel like they are okay and that I am doing something toward my health and that the house is not a sty, I can beat off most of voices in my head. I wish I could just understand why my brain is two different beings, one who seems very against me accomplishing even the smallest victory.
You'd think, being trapped in my head, it would want to be happy and live a long time and do lots of different things, not sulk and brood and assure me how much I suck. Whatever, Inner Nasty. I am putting you back in the coal hole, for you are being very naughty. (We just watched Silas Marner for English credit) Don't bother trying to come back out until you can act better.
Anyway, I had hoped to be at my next goal by my birthday, but a pound a week-my going average at the moment-puts me at only 5 pounds less by then. *sigh* I would have to get some kind of parasite to lose 4 pounds a week. It will take until the first week of November at the rate I am going. Oh well, as long as it's this year!
