Wednesday, June 6, 2012

mid-week




Matt will be home from Erie tomorrow, this has been the longest week of my life.

Tuesday, Zephyr went running in the pasture with the big dogs and never came back.  We have searched, made calls, posted flyers, contacted the vet and the animal shelters, put an ad in the paper and gone door to door.  I am sick over it, I don't feel that thing inside, that 'it will be okay' thing.  I am mostly sad for her, she's had a hard life until we got her and gave her a forever home, now that's gone.  Whether someone else took her or she was killed by other animals, her happy little life being the center of our lives is over.  And I am angry.


But that does not stop the progression of the theater.  With the addition of the second play, the kids are at the theater at least 5 nights a week the rest of this month and signed up for day camp 4 days the week before show week. I am so glad to have the distraction.  I think if we did not have an obligation to be away from the house as part of our routine, that we'd all just crumble over Zeppie.  I still just break down crying at the drop of a hat.  I spent the afternoon moving the house around so that the blank spots that used to house her stuff were not so obviously bare.  Her toys are everywhere, she was like a toddler always dragging things out and leaving them scattered.  Every time I find one, it's a new pang and the damn mockingbird that imitates her bark has ceased being amusing, I'd like to shoot it.  It's been a hard couple of days.  Getting the constant reminders out of sight has helped.  Or maybe it will help.  Not so many chances to be blindsided.

Matt's week in PA has been mixed for him.  There was an ugly meeting the first day which did not seem very fair from my POV.  Then things calmed down, then there was more drama.  Then today, a higher-up in the company sent a report to the president (of the company, not Obama) that said in part that Matt and his buddy Bill are the 2 best...whatever they are in the whole company.  You can tell how much I know about what he does all day.  It sounded good, Matt was thrilled, so that part of the week was okay.  It never hurts to be singled out for praise.



Last night and today, we had Emily over and we watched movies.  It was her birthday, she's 15!  Yesterday at Cathy's we sang her the song and had cake.  Chandler made brownies, but they were not...solid all the way through.  Our bakery has a ways to go yet!