Monday, May 28, 2012

Griping About Movies

I am sure there are bigger Joss fans than myself out there, but I consider myself pretty enthralled and have thought of him as a major talent for many years and I have watched everything he's been involved in, most things more than twice.  I was thrilled when he did Avengers and Matt and Jake went to see it opening weekend and were like squeally 7 year olds about  how great it was.

I finally got the chance to see it last night a the drive-in along with Battleship.  I have to confess, I was not as taken with it as I imagined, several points confused me and did not seem to go along with what I had come to believe about various characters.  In no order, here are most: Black Widow had more upper body strength than what was implied with her stick-like arms, still...a human female can hang on to the exhaust system of a speeder flying through the air.  A speeder that just came into the atmosphere from outer space somewhere.  I mean, the used a portal, so it probably wasn't THAT hot.  Maybe it was not hot at all, maybe they used non-fuel to propel it.  By 'it', I mean the ships that could travel through space, yet be taken down by an arrow that made them explode like fireworks.  That makes me think there's some fuel involved.

The battle between the heroes.  Is it so much more important to beat the other guy to a pulp and take back your prisoner-who got left on a mountain somewhere over that way while you have a three way with 2 other guys fighting to keep Loki under lock and key.  The same Loki who sat down to wait to be recaptured.  I know the whole Thor vs Iron Man and so on is fantasy material pissing contest, but...the bad guy was just sitting there, not in any kind of restraints.  If he had not planned to get put on the ship, he could have just strolled away and stolen himself a diet Dr. Pepper and sat at the park looking at the little picture of Hawkeye on the side between sips while plotting his next move.

Next thing, I understand Mjolnir is magical/enchanted, whatever.  Like Excalibur.  Like Tetsusaiga.  But Hulk could not pick it up.  Too heavy.  For HULK.  Then later, he saves the day by smashing a big dragon ship in the nose and stopping it dead, presumably killing everyone inside it...or maybe it's a living ship?  I never was clear on that, there did not seem to be landing gear.  Okay, so that makes me think that Thor could have done the same thing with Mjolnir and Hulk's smash attack is just redundant.

I just sat there feeling horrible for Manhattan.  They wrecked SO many buildings and it was so needless.  I guess the tornadoes were more psychologically damaging than I realized because all I could think was how long it was going to take before the area was back to normal-and how HUGE the pile at the landfill would be.  Or maybe they can reopen the portal and Hulk can throw the trash through the hole.  Or, jump up there.

I was not enthralled with the movie.  Hawkeye has barely any kind of back story, I felt like he was the little brother someone got stuck watching, even if he was cute and played well with the rest of the kids, I did not have any feel for him.  Black Widow was nearly as unfamiliar, though there was much chatting about her back story and she's kind of one-dimensional.  Female spy who uses her wiles to get information, has a heart of gold under that leather-clad bosom and can fight dirty though always seems to be searching for redemption.  I did like that she seemed actually afraid of Hulk.

And that brings me to the Hulk.  Okay...when did he start playing well with others?  Was it that he had a real enemy to focus his anger on?  Then why did he punch Thor?  The same Thor who had a tiny little knife thrust into his belly that weakened him enough to make his landing shaky and his arm all wobbly and then just went away.   And, finally, though not Avengers-specific, I don't like that Hulk jumps.  He's like a big, angry green flea.  I find it freaky and since this is my blog and my opinion, I am adding it.

There were moments I liked, of course.  Even the parts I am griping about, I still enjoyed watching.  I just hoped for...more.  Or something else.